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Ultra independency is a trauma response

Hyper-Independence: The Challenge of Doing Everything Alone

Being independent and self-reliant are often seen as positive traits. However, when the need for independence becomes extreme, it can lead to hyper-independence, which can be challenging to navigate.

Hyper-independence is a state of mind where a person feels that they have to do everything on their own, even when help is available. It can be driven by a fear of being perceived as weak or dependent on others. This can be a difficult way to live, as it can lead to isolation, burnout, and difficulty forming meaningful relationships. The origins of hyper-independence can vary. It may stem from childhood experiences where a person learned to rely on themselves due to a lack of support from others. It may also be a result of trauma, where a person learned that they couldn't rely on others to meet their needs.

Regardless of its origins, hyper-independence can be detrimental to mental health. It can lead to feelings of loneliness and isolation, and cause burnout from trying to do everything alone. It can also make it difficult to form and maintain healthy relationships. So, what can be done about hyper-independence? Here are some tips:

  1. Acknowledge the challenge: Recognize that hyper-independence is a challenge and that it's okay to ask for help. Remember that everyone needs support from time to time.

  2. Identify the root cause: Understanding the underlying reasons for hyper-independence can be helpful. It may be useful to explore these reasons with a mental health professional.

  3. Practice interdependence: Instead of striving for complete independence, focus on building interdependence. This means learning to rely on others for support when needed, while also being available to offer support to others.

  4. Build a support system: Surround yourself with people who can provide emotional and practical support. This can include friends, family, or support groups.

  5. Seek professional help: If hyper-independence is causing significant distress, seek professional help from a mental health provider. They can help you develop coping skills and strategies to manage hyper-independence.

In conclusion, hyper-independence can be a challenging way to live, but it's important to remember that it's possible to change. By acknowledging the challenge, identifying the root cause, practicing interdependence, building a support system, and seeking professional help, it's possible to develop a healthier approach to independence and build meaningful relationships.





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